The Withering Flower Blooming in Harsh Condition

The Withering Flower Blooming in Harsh Condition
by Amalia Fitri Annisa

Ajeng Ratna, smiling and
posing with V-sign

Always come on-time and all-prepared, she’s ready to face all kind of subjects even though she knows all of them are hard.

Each time the class started, she always shows her serious face proving that she is ready. She always pays attention to the lecturers and their explanation while taking notes on her binder. No matter how hard the lessons are or how difficult they are explained by the lecturers, she could still make a wide smile after the class ended and make jokes that make us laughing out loud.

“Come on, guys. We have to keep in high spirit! Don’t make it too serious, lha.”

She will always say that after one or some of her friends complained about how hard the lessons were, of course after repeatedly saying her beauty is the one that will make us in high spirit. Seeing no correlation between them, some of her friend who heard it would sigh, shook their head, or even laugh.

Maybe she looks like one of those who born smart without ever studying or those who were always studying like it is their hobby, but no she is not. There is a lot more stories behind someone names Ajeng Ratna Sari.

It was all started in her childhood life. When she was 3, her parents already had a lot of arguing. This was why she decided to spend almost all her times played outside with her friend, and a lot of them were boys. In her childhood until elementary school, she always became buddy with boys. And this was continued until she was 11 years old.

”Since I was in elementary school, I always played with my friends until the dusk came. My parents never looked up or searched for me. Even after I came to house to take a bath and have dinner and then my friends asked me to play again until late, my parents not bother to forbid me and just let me went to play with them.” She said with her usual tone, careless. “Oh, and I just went back at 9 P.M and they didn’t angry or ask me anything.”

Because of it, her grade was always bad but she didn’t take it seriously, nor did her parents. They never asked her to be the best and just wanted her have it.

“They never asked me what I’ve been learned or how was the school at all. Even I ever got bullied in the school because of my bad grades. That’s why in junior high school I wanted to prove them that I could do better and could achieve something.”

Playing seriously

That was at the first semester when she was in 6^th grade, her cousin said that the national exam would be very hard to pass it began to scare her to death. She never studied at all and it made her thought that the chance for her to pass the exam is zero. She was so afraid that she spent all one year to study and improve her grade.

“You could say that I changed from a very sociable girl to a shut in girl. But it’s all worthy, my exam result was the highest in my school.”

She was happy for it and hoped her parents would take notice on her, but they still kept busy with their problems. This kept happen until she was in junior high school. At some point, she finally felt lonely when she realized her parents actually not care for her as long as she looked fine physically.

“I just realized it when I was in my junior high. Maybe because from the very first I always play with my friends, and when I actually start to shut myself in to focus on study, it actually makes me feel very lonely.”

Despite felt lonely, she kept focus on learning and getting better. Until on some point she thought that all lessons she learned in junior high were very easy as she felt she didn’t have to learn hard as she did in the last year of elementary school.  Even so, she still hoped that her parents at least paid attention to her. But unfortunately she didn’t get it and the fighting got worse.

Because of that kind of condition she lived in every day, she finally got used to it. She didn’t get bothered and could still focus studying even when her parents started to argue again.

“Yeah, I kind of used to it because, well, it happened almost every day. I just learn to keep focus on myself and ignore them fighting.” Ajeng said while positioning herself. “I still have my friends and my cousin to accompany me whenever I get bored. I spend a lot of fun times with them.”

It’s hard to keep yourself happy in her position, but you still have to get yourself together as Ajeng Ratna did in her life. When we get support emotionally from our family, she couldn’t get it. Many choose a wrong way to find emotional supports as people really need it. But Ajeng can still help herself to grow as a better person and keep improving herself despite lacks of support from her parents.

Each of us has our own problems and we shouldn’t make them as an excuse to blame for having a bad life. As we know that even a withering flower can still keep blooming in a harsh condition. It even asks us to keep happy!

“Everything is going to be alright! Don’t make life too hard, okay? My beauty will make you feel better!”